The eldest son is the oldest son in a family.
Spiritual here means “close to God.” The preacher used it to mean “better than other Christians.”
A widow is a woman whose husband has died.
The pulpit is the place in a church where the preacher stands.
Rebaptism means baptizing a person a second time.
Two eldest sons
Two men went to the same church. Each man was the eldest son in his family.
Family One. The son is a friend of the pastor. His father became very ill. The son went to see him. His father got better.
Family Two. The son is not close to the pastor. He did not agree to be baptized again. His father was in his eighties. He became very ill. The son went to see him. The family paid for the best care they could. His father died after many weeks in hospital.
The son came back to church. He was very sad. The preacher told a story about “two eldest sons.” He said: one son was spiritual, and his father got better. The other son trusted his money, and the money did not help.
The son was in the church. His mother was there too. Her husband had just died.
Someone who heard the sermon told us what it said. We do not name any person, church or place.
He visited his father. His father got better. That is a good gift from God. This page does not blame him.
Five points
- Nobody can earn God’s love by being “more spiritual.” God’s love is a gift.
- When someone gets better or dies, it is not God’s report card on their family.
- Paying for your father’s care is good. God tells us to honour our parents.
- We must cry with people who are sad. We must not use their sadness to make a point.
- The preacher said something God did not say, and he said it in God’s name. That is wrong.
This is my own opinion. A preacher can thank God when a sick man gets better. He should. But he must not compare that family with a family whose father died. And he must not say he knows why God let one man live and one man die.
Can you earn God’s love?
For by grace you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourselves; it is the gift of God.
Ephesians 2:8 · World English Bible
In simple words: God saves us because he is kind. It is a gift. We do not earn it.
So no Christian can become “more spiritual” and then get a better result from God. God does not pay people with good results.
Is getting better a reward? Is dying a punishment?
Do you think that these Galileans were worse sinners than all the other Galileans, because they suffered such things? I tell you, no
Luke 13:2–3 · World English Bible
In simple words: People asked Jesus: “Did these people die because they were worse sinners?” Jesus said: “No.”
Time and chance happen to them all.
Ecclesiastes 9:11 · World English Bible
In simple words: Good things and hard things happen to everyone.
Many people in the Bible loved God, and still became ill or died. The prophet Elisha died of an illness. Lazarus died, and Jesus loved him. Stephen was full of the Holy Spirit, and he was killed. Faith does not tell you who will get better.
Your father’s death is not God’s report card on you.
Is it wrong to pay for your father’s care?
Let them learn first to show piety toward their own family and to repay their parents, for this is acceptable in the sight of God.
1 Timothy 5:4 · World English Bible
In simple words: Children should take care of their parents. God is pleased with this.
Jesus was angry with religious teachers who told people not to help their parents (Mark 7). In the story of the Good Samaritan, the good man paid for a hurt man’s care (Luke 10). Paying for your father’s care is not “trusting money.” It is obeying God.
What should a church do when someone is sad?
Rejoice with those who rejoice. Weep with those who weep.
Romans 12:15 · World English Bible
In simple words: Be happy with happy people. Cry with sad people.
So they sat down with him on the ground seven days and seven nights, and no one spoke a word to him, for they saw that his grief was very great.
Job 2:13 · World English Bible
In simple words: Job’s friends sat with him quietly for a week, because he was so sad. This was the best thing they did.
Pure religion and undefiled before our God and Father is this: to visit the fatherless and widows in their affliction, and to keep oneself unstained by the world.
James 1:27 · World English Bible
In simple words: God wants us to care for widows and children who have lost a parent.
At Lazarus’ grave, “Jesus wept” (John 11:35). Jesus knew he would bring Lazarus back to life. But first he cried with the family.
Saying what God did not say
Job’s friends said: “Your children died because God is punishing you.” God was angry with them.
You have not spoken of me the thing that is right, as my servant Job has
Job 42:7 · World English Bible
In simple words: God said: “You said wrong things about me.”
The Ten Commandments say: do not misuse God’s name. When a preacher says “God did this to your family because you were not spiritual,” and God never said it, he is misusing God’s name.
“Two of our members went to see their sick fathers. One father got better. We thank God. The other father has died. We are sad with his son and his wife. Let us love both families this week.”
A word for you
Your parent’s death was not God’s judgment on your faith.
Caring for your parent was good. Paying for their care was good.
God does not keep a list of who is “spiritual enough” for a good result. Jesus cried at a grave. He promised to raise the dead.
You do not have to believe what someone says about your sadness, even if he says it from the pulpit.
Read it yourself
- Read Luke chapter 13, verses 1 to 5.
- Read Job chapter 2, verses 11 to 13, and Job chapter 42, verse 7.
- Read John chapter 11.
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